It’s Never Easy

Posted: May 5, 2011 in Daily Rain, LoveShits Rainy Days, Sad in the Rain

Hello, you do not get to judge me you know. I’m trying to be strong. Every night I face that temptation to view him but yeah I KNOW I SHOULDN’T. I do not go around telling everyone my sob story. I only vent here. So like what’s it to you? Sure, it’s been so long and time still didn’t cure me completely to move on. I mean, I still think of him sometimes. So what?

I know he doesn’t want me in his life now. I know he can walk past me like a stranger without remembering what we did together. I know his life is fine now. Why would I want to go disturb him again?

Maybe I just seem like the dumb girl who loved the wrong guy too much and now become the emo wtf ex and yeah, maybe I am. Maybe I took it too seriously and he wasn’t the one for me. But still. It’s hard geddit?

Like yeah i remember every friday I’d really look forward to seeing him but he’d be late and I’d be upset. Like i’m constantly thinking as him. if my girlfriend is waiting for me i wouldn’t want to keep her waiting. I’d rush to see her. But for him, he’d walk slowly, talk to friends, go find someone, and forget me, and when I got mad he’d say can’t you just wait extra 5 minutes.

And as time passed if I didn’t mention tomorrow meet where we’d just not say. But I’d still wait for him thinking he might show up but yeah no. And when I asked did he look for me he’d say no. Like he didn’t care. Which he didn’t in those last couple of months. He claimed he was studying and didn’t have time to text so I don’t know was he avoiding me or what. I guess I was inconsiderate also getting mad and sadder as we contacted less and less. And everytime meet we’d fight and not talk.

JPA out TOMORROW WTF

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Comments
  1. ra says:

    All the best for your JPA scholarship. bet u’ll get it…would like to hear from you. 😉

    cheer up. =)

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