Hole in the Heart

Posted: May 23, 2011 in Angry in the Rain, LoveShits Rainy Days, Sad in the Rain

Crying alone in the night.

It’s something I don’t want to do anymore. I can’t wait to fly off and forget.. Leave it all behind.

It hurts to see him comforting his girl friend and telling him things like smile more,  drink  more water, comforting her. Though I guess they’re just best friends or what. But still, I’m jealous. It hurts so bad to know I’m not in his life but others are.

I try to read her blog just to catch a glimpse of your name. I mean.. I guess you guys are best friends and stuff but I’m just so jealous. I miss you so much.. Seeing you being so nice to another girl just kills me inside. I don’t even think she likes me. I tried asking her about you before but she just totally brushed me off and I guess it’s only acceptable.

Sometimes it feels like I’ll never meet someone new again. This gnawing feeling in my tummy.. It just kills me literally.

Everything I did, I am sorry. I just want you to know I love you. It’s so easy for others to forget their exes.. But for me? It’s a struggle to stay afloat. I don’t know why. It’s not like I’m such an antisocial person and only had him. Or I had a rough family background and he was my only salvation. Maybe I’m just naturally born weak this way.

I wish I could pick you up and just kiss you. I wish I could just go out to Spring without being afraid I’d bump into you.

😥 anyone with advice? Sighs.

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Comments
  1. Banzai says:

    At your current rate , you’ll be nothing but an empty shell.
    Where is your self-love? Do you not love yourself? If so , why are you doing this to yourself?

    Ena , if not for yourself , save yourself for the people who care , your friends , your family.

    Are you willing to be like this? Just cause of him?

  2. ena says:

    not like i cutting myself or what la LOL

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