I Don’t Want To Live Here Anymore

Posted: February 26, 2012 in Sad in the Rain

Mummy called and she says she’s so worried about me. She said she cried when she read my Facebook posts and she said she isn’t going to scold me for losing my phone. She knows how happy I was when I got it and now, she knows how sad I am.. She said she would never have scolded me cause she knows how sad I am and she hopes I will stay strong and not think about it.

She’s so different from the old mum i used to know who would scold me so badly for this happening. Oh god mum.. I never appreciated you till now. She said no matter how poor she is, she’ll buy me back the phone. She said Daddy is going to give me all the money he is getting from the old age fund and giving it to me to buy a phone. She said don’t tell the brother.

How much they must love me, to say all this. To think about buying me back my phone even when they are struggling with daily problems. To not scold me, instead they are comforting me. How selfish I am, to be so sad and desperate about something so trivial as a phone when my parents are working so hard and even now, they are willing to sacrifice for me because they know how down I am. Daddy even said he doesn’t want me to get any part time job here just to buy my phone again. How I have failed as a daughter, how I have disappointed them with all the things I’ve done. Clubbing, drinking, lying to them. I wish I could go back home and never have to set foot here again, I really do. I don’t ever want to come back here anymore.

I miss my family so much that it aches.. It does. I lost my boyfriend, my phone and my self-respect in a single month. Please don’t take anything else away from me.

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Comments
  1. The Unappreciated Friend says:

    This post really touched my heart. Glad to see that you have grown up and matured. Stay strong mentally and move on from the past 🙂

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